My family

"Parents, you should commence to discipline the minds of your children while they are young, to the end that they may be Christians. . . . Beware how you lull them to sleep over the pit of destruction, with the mistaken thought that they are not old enough to be accountable, not old enough to repent of their sins and profess Christ.Children of eight, ten, or twelve years are old enough to be addressed on the subject of personal religion. Do not teach your children with reference to some future period when they shall be old enough to repent and believe the truth. If properly instructed, very young children may have correct views of their state as sinners and of the way of salvation through Christ."  -Something EGW said from somewhere. LOL

I would like my children to be presented with everything pertaining to salvation to the point where they could be able to teach the Bible, rightly dividing the word of truth. Now this, I believe is a dream fostering my hope in God. So therefore I have no problem dreaming it. A reason that I believe that this a dream fostering a hope in God is that it is very hard for me to ponder this dream for long periods of time. LOL, meaning that I am not obsessing over it and it does not take precedence over what God may want for me. Another reason why I believe that I cannot ponder this dream for long periods of time is my lack of knowledge on the topic of raising children. Through my lack of Bible study, I feel ill-prepared, at this moment, to raise children that would be christian examples to the world. Another reason why the dream is super hard for me to ponder for long periods of time is because I have not had a good example. What I want to do with my children, to my knowledge, has not been clearly presented to me. I feel improperly prepared because my family situation growing up to the present time has not been the best.
Now do not get me wrong. I believe that children are a very big part of why we should get married. One of the first commands given to mankind was to be fruitful and multiply. However, I believe the foundation of a good family life is a good marriage between God, the man and the woman. With a good foundation, the children will be able to learn the basics in how to treat their fellow human beings and how to treat God. The reason why I write about this is because my brothers and I , coming from a dysfunctional family, like to think of ourselves as well off. When my Aunty Esther used to complain about us, we used brag about how we weren't like other children on the streets who do drugs, who sell drugs, who gang bang, etc. We made okay grades, and in comparison to our peers, we would excel and succeed. However, there are deeper problems. I can see that my brothers do not know how to treat me as a female. I do not know how to treat them as men, in fact I bad talk men every chance I get, although this is something I am trying to stop. We do not pray together or worship together. There is so much spiritual confusion among us three that we each have our own religion and to be quite honest none of them entirely fit into Seventh Day Advent ism or Christianity. We each honestly believe that the other does not have life right and yet we would do the bare minimum to help the other. Because we respect the individuality of the other person. We live independently from each other and soon we will carve our own paths in the world and plant families of our own and if God does not intervene, the next generation will be the same. God, save my children